The Super Glue Waterproof

This is hot off the press! We have just received news that the mysterious and elusive Dr. Fard has recently launched a new item from his lab.

Encased in an ordinary looking plastic tube, with a simple label of the words “Super Glue Waterproof” on it and no instructions, we could only speculate what is this tube is for.

According to our contact (the only one in the world who is able to get close to Dr. Fard), the Super Glue Waterproof has amazing properties and can work wonders for the human race.

Dr. Fard has provided the assurance that the Super Glue Waterproof is not harmful to the human body, has no side effects and may even have surprising effects.

What does the Super Glue Waterproof actually do? Despite the assurance from Dr. Fard (through our contact), can we really be sure? We found 3 volunteers who bravely put their necks out to test this new product.

Amazing properties of the Super Glue Waterproof

– an exclusive interview with a brave volunteer

Below is an excerpt from an exclusive interview with one of the volunteers, who only wants to be known as Ray, as reported by our inhouse reporter, Agent Moonwalker.

Agent Moonwalker: What made you decide to take on the experiment?

Ray: I’m sort of at a crossroad in my life, at a loose end, and this seems like fun. I thought it might be interesting to do something different. Who knows what I may get out of it.

Agent Moonwalker: How did you use it? Did you ingest it? Apply it to some part of your body or what?

Ray: It seems like someone is very greedy, I only got a dot of it, which was given to me on a tiny piece of paper, can’t even think what’s the deal with giving so little. So I sniff it and it’s all I did. I wasn’t sure at first whether anything went into my system, because I didn’t smell anything, but then things started happening.

Agent Moonwalker: What sort of things?

Ray: Well, I inhaled deeply and at once I could feel the glue pass through my nostril. Don’t ask me how because there’s no smell. Instead, it felt like something liquid going pass my nostrils, into my throat, down the esophagus and into the stomach like smooth cream flowing down. After that I could feel it all over, but specifically in my left arm. And then the strangest thing happened.

Agent Moonwalker: Sounds intriguing, what happened next?

Ray: I accidentally cut myself with a penknife the day before. The cut was not deep but covered a wide area, there was some blood and I bandaged it up. Today I could still feel some slight throbbing pain. Now the strange thing happened, I felt like glue entering my left arm. Suddenly, the pain was gone and when I opened up the bandage, I could see that it has more or less healed. I think that’s the glue at work here.

Agent Moonwalker: That’s amazing! That means the glue has some healing properties. Could there be other functions for it?

Ray: I’m not sure and I’m still monitoring myself. One thing to be said is, I have never felt this good in ages.

Agent Moonwalker: Well, that’s an interesting report from the volunteer. We will continue to investigate to find out more and will continue to bring you the truths, the false and the daring. We are still trying to secure an interview with another volunteer and will put forth our report once we received some news.

Super Glue Waterproof – An Advancement in Medical History?

After the exclusive interview was published, we received a lot of emails from readers, who wanted to know more. There were at least 50 more requests for participating in the experiment. We have to express regrets that we have rejected all the requests, but will keep you readers informed, when new volunteers are needed.

Stay tuned for more news to come.

We love to hear from you, what do you think of this new Super Glue Waterproof? Leave your comments below.

Agent Moonwalker, Special Agent Reporter